JANUARY 30, 2016..... will be a date forever etched in my heart.... you see my mom went to heaven that day

Yes....My mom is an angel now.  She left this earth on January 30, 2016 around noon time.  I cried and cried just because she is my mom.  I now feel that I have a void on my heart.  I am standing on my faith to get through this sadness, because I know that my mom is a lot better off than I am.

That does not keep me from missing her.  I miss her.  I don't have any grandmothers on earth either. I feel like I don't have anyone now that I am close to or that understands me when I need to talk to them.  My heart hurts.  Please keep me in your prayers.

HOLDING ON TO JESUS

Holding on to Jesus... yes that is my goal.  I am very tired of the way life if going right now.  I am tired of work, I am tired of home life, I am just tired of everything.  I am tired of dealing with land issues, sick of the holidays, tired of being without money.  At least I can get it out of my system on here because no ones reads it anyway.  I am tired of not have a dependable car that can get me where I need to go without using 2 quarts every four days. I am tired of not having a stove so I can cook.  I am tired of my refrigerator not working correctly.  I am tired of family not including me on things that are important.  I am tired of family not checking on you to see if you might need to go anywhere.  Tired of not having enough money for food and tired of not being able to provide what I need to for my son.  I hope that soon things will turn around for the good..... right now I am holding onto Jesus's hand so that he can guide me through these everyday struggles of life, because without him, I just assume crawl under a rock and stay there.

My Christmas List.... Please Santa fill my list.... my stove and refrigerator is not working and I just need a better vehicle

My life as a punching bag where words are throwing the punches

Words... yes words.  They can make or break you.  Words of wisdom, words of kindness, words of encouragement, words of love.  Those are the words that we all want to hear.  Words of the Bible,
now those are the words that reach through the thickness of your heart and allow love from God fill you heart and soul.

Words from human beings are the ones that cut through you like a knife.  It only takes one word from someone that can really knock you to your knees. It is not only adults that deliver these punching words but children do to.  As a mother, my child can throw some pretty good words sometimes, but the ones that hurt me the most comes from the other adult in my house.

It seems that these words are always used when things are not going their way, or when they get mad about something.  I am always the punching bag that catches these words.  Words of hate, words that hurt, words of make no since, words of it is all your fault, words of you doing wrong, words of why don't you do this, words of if.  Words that hurt you, words that makes you hate, words that make you wish you were all alone.  Words of stress, words of depression, words of need. 

Words... yes words.
Words of the Bible is where I put my trust.  Trust in God with all your heart, because their is no
words that mankind can offer that will comfort you as those of words of our Almighty YHWH.

My words to you,

I wish you many smiles and blessings today and everyday

Tracy

LIFE IS LIKE A BOX OF CHOCOLATES....

LIFE is like a box of chocolates.... some days is filled with sweetness and others days you fill like a chocolate that has melted.

These days, I feel like the melted one.  It has been like that now for weeks.  I just can't get it together and feel depressed over situations that I cannot get a handle on.  I hope soon that I am back to the sweetness of life, because it is really is starting to affect my well being.  I am tired of melting.

Have a blessed day to who every reads this.

Tracy

I wish my Nannie was here......

Oh how I wish my grandmother was here on earth.  I know she is having a time in heaven but I really need her now.  My Nannie, would listen to my problems, give me hugs, share life experiences, show me to love God and would help me anyway she could.  I really really miss her when I need someone to talk to about lifes problems.  She would help me when I need to restock my pantry before paydays.  I am so desperately in need of a car and I know if my Nannie she would help me get the one that I have found.  I need a co-signer in order to get it and she would do it for me.  I don't have anyone else.  When my grandmother died, I lost a part of me.  My grandmother's will left me and my sisters out of it because other relatives had it fixed so it was their gain.  There were items that I so cherished that belonged to my Nannie, but I did not get any of it.  She had Christmas ornaments that I loved, she had her cookbooks that I did not even get one of,  I did get a bible that was hers and I cherish it.  It is like she has left little notes in it to help me along.  So Nannie, while you are up there running on the streets of gold, would you please stop by and visit with Jesus and God  and ask them to send me a debt free vehicle and a pantry full of groceries.  Nannie you would not believe how much Jamison has grown and how much he eats.  Tell Mamaw and Papaw Shaw hello for me and Mamaw Ingram too.  Give Pop a hug and tell JerJer and Papaw James that Jamie really misses them

Love
Tracy

Alabama Sustainable Agriculture Network

Hey Alabama and everyone else.....

  Check this site out.....  It is a fantastic site:   http://asanonline.org/


Blessings

Tracy